Comics In Action

AGENT NAME: Butters

AKA: Brian Bodensteiner, Hey’sus H. Khrist, Corporal Cholesterol, Country Crock,

AGE: 27

SEX: Hmmm, well I prefer the woman on the to…no wait that’s to personal I’m not answering that.

MODUS OPERANDI: Moderately priced kitchen utensils

BACKGROUND: Growing up on a small farm in NE Iowa, Butters quickly “churned” out unfunny one-liners by the dozen. Seeing that no one thought he was funny he roamed the earth looking for the root of all humor. Finding only knock knock jokes and prop comics he was feeling dejected when he found his true calling, Hummel Figurines. This new found addiction to small ceramic objects came at a price though, $23.99 to be exact. To help pay for this horrible affliction he started selling pictures of Agent Stiletto that he made from superimposing her head on Condeliza Rice’s body. Sadly tragedy struck, while singing in the shower Agent Butters used the shower head as a microphone and drowned. (didn’t see that coming did you) luckily Agent Butters twin also named Agent Butters took over his love of having people laugh at him. In memory of his twin he decided to start a church. The Church of Butters was founded to spread the word of Butters. The message was simple Dairy is good. His simple message of kindness was quickly dashed by the evil soy industry. They wanted nothing more then to have their Soy milk drank by everyone. Unfettered, Butters carried on. To date his parish has doubled in size. It appears everything is coming up Butters

LAST KNOWN LOCATION: He can be found blowing like the wind through the hearts of mothers and in the smiles of little children. He is everywhere, but what if you don’t believe he exists? Does he really? Do any of us really exist?